Chapter 15: Because His Mother is a Fool



Everyone at the old farmhouse jumped into high gear the moment that Kira passed on to Bo what she and Jebb had planned. Jesse sent the fellas out in the stock car as he and Daisy took the Jeep after he had tried to call his brother’s house only to get a busy signal. Daisy had been the only one to be surprised by the sudden wedding since Jesse knew what had happened in Placid by speaking with his brother the day before and the fellas had all interrogated Jebb last night before they turned in for the night. They hadn’t known what to say when Jebb told them what had happened when Pauline had found the video of him and Kira at the race together. They knew that she wouldn’t take the relationship well, but even they didn’t think that she would take it this bad. Now the two were heading toward the Honeymooner’s capital of the state to get married.

Daisy was hoping for a big wedding but thought that eloping was a pretty romantic thing for her cousins to do, too. And it wasn’t like they were doing it without telling anyone. So she’d still get to be the Maid of Honor. As she got closer to the county line, probably the only county line that no one ever monitored to keep the two Dukes that weren’t supposed to leave Hazzard from crossing (since everyone figured that if they’d had a reason to go there everyone’s job might be a little easier), Daisy began to feel as nervous as if it was HER wedding that she was speeding toward.




The moment that the family got to the small little chapel that Kira and Jebb were waiting at, Daisy pulled Kira aside, insisting that even if she didn’t have a dress to wear, that her hair and make-up should be done perfectly to get married. Heading off to a small room down the hall; Jebb was left with the other Duke men to wait for the women to return. Jesse pulled Jebb aside and handed him a small box.

“What’s this, Uncle Jesse?”

“It’s Lavinia’s wedding ring. I was saving it for when one of you boys got married.”

Jebb looked at the small band in the box. “Don’t you want to save this for Luke or Bo?”

Jesse made a face, “One of them? Do you know what the odds of that ever happening is?”

“Yeh, I know. Like hogs producin’ beef.” Jebb laughed as they both thought about the old running joke in the family. “Seems to me that you use to say the same thing about me.”

“Well, what can I say? Even I can be wrong; once or twice.” Jesse smiled. “This ring has been passed on to Duke Women for generations. This ring even belonged to your great-great-grandmother. Besides, I think Lavinia would like knowing that the ring’s goin’ to Kira. Not to mention that this might be the only chance to pass this ring on to the next Duke Woman the way all your cousins are all goin’.”

“Thanks Uncle Jesse.” Jebb gave his uncle a hug.

“Now, I think I’d better go hurry Daisy up. Because otherwise, she’ll go to primping Kira for hours.” With that, Jesse left Jebb with the younger males of the family. Bo came over and slung an arm across Jebb’s shoulders.

“You ready for this?”

“You kiddin’? No more worrin’ about gettin’ peppered with buck shot.”

“Nope, just a dynamite tipped arrow instead.”

“Kira told ya about that huh?”

“Didn’t seem like such a bad idea at the time neither. I’ll have to keep that on the back burner.” Bo laughed as he teased his cousin. “Just in case,” Bo added with a grin.

Bo saw as Jebb unconsciously glance toward the door, he knew that he was wishing that his parents could have been here. After all, of all of the cousins, he was the only one who still HAD parents. Despite everything that had happened so far, he still didn’t like not having them here for his wedding, even his mother. But he had tried to call home again when he had gotten here only to find that the phone was still off of the hook. Bo decided to try to cheer up his cousin, his very soon to be brother by marriage.

“Hey Jebb, do you know why the church is set up the way it is for a wedding?”

“No, why?”

“Well, when a woman takes her last walk as a single gal, the first thing that she sees is the aisle. From there, she looks up to see the altar. Finally, the bride looks to see her groom. In this case, YOU. So the last sentence that crosses a bride’s mind before she gets married is, ‘I’ll alter YOU!’.”

Jebb laughed at Bo attempt to brighten his mood. “Well, it’ll be worth it. While you guys are still out runnin’ from girls’ daddies, trying to remember whose birthday is when, and keepin’ names straight, I’LL only have to worry about ONE girl.”

“You’d better,” Bo replied good naturedly. “Otherwise Luke and I just might have to go target practicin’.” Bo stood there before his soon to be brother in law and suddenly felt a little awkward again. He figured that was normal. Like if your best friend was marrying your sister. You still like them, it just makes things complicated. Looking around, Bo added, “I think I’ll go help Jesse hurry Daisy up. Otherwise, Kira might lose her patience with her. I doubt that Kira’s used to the likes of Daisy hangin’ all over her.” With that, Bo went to find his sister before she walked down the aisle.




“You ready for this?” Bo asked his sister while they waited for the last minute preparations to be done, by Daisy of course.

“As ready as I’ll ever be. How’s Jebb?” Kira looked at her brother trying to see anything that Bo might not actually tell her.

“He’s fine. Got Judd holdin’ the shotgun on ‘em for me while I’m back here with ya,” Bo gave his best and brightest smile as he answered her question.

“Very cute, Bo. You know that’s not what I mean.”

Bo nodded his head, he did know. “About as good as can be expected I guess. He never figured that his mom would go this far. None of us did.”

“Yeh, and it’s all because of me.”

“Kira, ain’t none of this on you. It’s all Pauline’s own stubbornness. In fact, I think that knowing that Jebb was plannin’ to marry you made the fact that you were dating easier to accept.”

“Wait a minute. You KNEW that Jebb was goin’ to ask?”

“He told us last month when he came out about y’all.”

“Did EVERYONE get a head’s up before me? First he tells y’all, and then Pauline found the ring while doing laundry-”

“It looks like. You’re goin’ to have to get better at keepin’ tabs on Jebb now that you’re goin’ to be his wife. And you’ll have to learn how to wield a fryin’ pan, too. Daisy can give ya lessons on that.” Kira laughed at the image of Daisy taking the cooking tool to her brother.

“Speakin’ from experience?”

“You have NO idea how much that stuff hurts.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” Behind the door, Bo and Kira were interrupted by the sound of the organ beginning to play.

“I think that’s our cue.” Bo gave his sister a quick hug before she took his arm. Bo hated to admit it, but he knew that he’d never have been able to do this so soon if she was marrying anyone else.

As Bo walked his sister down the aisle, he could swear that his uncle was crying. He reckoned that Jesse had given up on any of the younger Dukes getting married. Well here he’s going to get a two for one special. When he and Kira reached the altar, the minister began right away.

“Dear family and friends, I call upon all of you gathered here to be fellow witnesses with me in the marriage of Kira Kyle and Jebb Duke. The decision to marry is based in love and founded upon sincerity and understanding, which leads to a relationship that is rich in confidence and trust.

A strong marriage is dependent upon many factors. Beyond the love, respect and trust that you share with one another, there must be a strong sense of commitment and loyalty that bonds you. A shared faith and beliefs in God, and His grace in your lives, is important in building a strong marriage. And also important are a shared companionship and a willingness to communicate openly with one another. This respectful communication and the love that it displays, helps each partner to accept and understand the other’s strengths and weaknesses and allow for the continued growth that is necessary in all good and lasting marriages. As you are joined together in matrimony here today, in my presence and in the presence of your family and friends, I am to remind you of the serious and binding nature of marriage.

The commitment of marriage is one of the most important commitments that two people will make in their lifetime. Marriage, as most of us understand it, is a voluntary and full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest sense, to the exclusion of all others, and is intended to last a lifetime. The vow of marriage is a pledge of everlasting love, within the unity of matrimony, whereby, committing to share all that life has to offer, the good times and the bad, with patience and understanding. For a marriage to remain strong, your faith in that vow must never waver. It must remain strong through the trials of everyday life. The words that you speak to each other today are to be the cornerstone for your life together from this day forward.

May I ask who gives this woman to be wed?”

Bo cleared his throat, before he was able to get the words out with a slight squeak, “I do, her brother.” With that, Bo put Kira’s hand in Jebb’s and stepped back to join Jesse and Judd. Since Luke was serving as best man.

The minister continued, “Jebb and Kira have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?”

Both bride and groom answered together, “We have.”

Minister, “Will you love and honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives?”

“We will.”

“Now, you will repeat the vows after me, (nodding toward Jebb to indicate that he was to go first) Kira, in affirmation of my love for you, I invite you to join your life with mine from this day forward. I will respect you and cherish you always. I promise to share with you all that life has to offer. I give myself to you, in kindness, unselfishness and trust, as we strive towards achieving a full and complete life together. I, Jebb, take you Kira, to be my lawful wedded wife and partner, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health as long as we both shall live.”

The minister then nodded toward Kira before they continued. “Jebb, in affirmation of my love for you, I invite you to join your life with mine from today forward. I will respect you and cherish you always. I promise to share with you all that life has to offer. I give myself to you, in kindness, unselfishness and trust, as we strive towards achieving a full and complete life together. I, Kira, take you Jebb, to be my lawful wedded husband and partner, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health as long as we both shall live.”

“Now I ask that God bless this ring that Jebb will give Kira as a symbol of their love and fidelity. Now place the ring on her finger and repeat after me; Kira, with all that I am and all that I have, I give you this ring as a symbol of my everlasting love.”

The minister pauses before once again carrying on. “As you begin your married life together hold close to you the words that you have spoken to each other today. Life isn’t always an easy road, as you both know. Rely on your faith in your promises made today to see you through those times. In times of trouble be strong. Ask God to grant you the gifts of caring and understanding in your life together, allowing that each may be to the other a source of strength in need, a counselor in times of uncertainty, a comfort in times of sorrow, and a companion in your joys.

You have declared before all of us that you will now live your lives together in marriage. You have made special promises to each other, which have been symbolized by the joining of hands, taking of vows and giving and receiving of the ring.

By the authority vested in me as a Minister of the Great State of Georgia, I now pronounce you to be husband and wife.” Jebb reaches for Kira to kiss her without waiting for THAT particular instruction much to the amusement of the others in the room.

“Now that the ceremony is over and the experience of living day to day is about to begin, go and meet it gladly. May I have the pleasure of presenting to you, for the first time as husband and wife, Mr. and Mrs. Jebb Duke!”




Pauline was busy taking down the decorations from Christmas with her sister in law, Grace, when her husband came in from tending the animals in the barn. They had reached an uneasy truce about Jebb and Kira by simply agreeing to wait for the other to calm down a bit. They had decided that they would talk about Jebb’s relationship with Kira in a couple of days. Pauline couldn’t really believe that Jebb would choose being in such a relationship over his own family. Until he was willing to admit that considering such a thing is wrong, she really didn’t see that she had anything to say to her errant son. It was simply time for some tough love. After all, she had two other children to worry about. She can’t allow them to believe that something like this is okay.

Walking by the phone, John notices that the phone was off the hook, AGAIN.

“Why’s this thing sittin’ like this? What if Jebb tries to call?”

“That’s precisely WHY I left it like that. I don’t have anything to say to that boy right now.”

“Well, maybe I do. So leave it alone.” John hung the phone back up and headed into the kitchen to get a drink. On his way back by, it rang so he picked it up before his wife could get to it.

“Duke Farm, John Duke speaking,” John paused and saw his wife look his way to see who was on the phone. “Jesse...Yeh, we’ve had problems with the line over here.” John glared at his wife for having to lie to his brother about why no one had been able to get through to the house. “I see. Yes, thanks for letting me know...I wish I could have too... Bye Jesse.”

“What did Jesse want?”

“He was calling to let me know that MY son just got married, and I missed it because his MOTHER is a fool.”

Pauline looked up in shock as he left the room, both at her husband saying that she was a fool and at the news that Jebb had actually gotten married. She could have sworn that he wouldn’t actually go through with it. He was supposed to come back home and admit that he was wrong about him and Kira. That there could never really be anything between them. But MARRIED! Her baby married that GIRL. How could he?




After spending a couple of nights in one of the near by hotels, Jebb and Kira spent the rest of their time before having to return to Atlanta in Hazzard. Jebb had finally been able to get through to his father who tried to make excuses for his mother when she would suddenly discover that she had some urgent matter that needed to be taken care of once Jebb was on the phone. Kira now was down to just one day left before having to return to the courtroom and insisted that there was one thing that had to be done first. Jebb needed to see his probation officer to let him know about the recent change in address. So now, they were heading toward Placid for Jebb to meet up with him. They had also arranged to have lunch with Jebb’s dad afterwards at the diner near the courthouse in Tranquil. Getting closer to the county line, Kira couldn’t help but to bring up one subject that they hadn’t talked about it just yet.

“When I get into work, tomorrow, I’ll go ahead and give my notice. I’ll probably need to stay in Atlanta through to the end of January, but no longer than that.” Kira stared out of the passenger side window as she saw the outskirts of Tranquil come into view.

“You ain’t got to quit your job Kira. I don’t mind livin’ in Atlanta.” Jebb eyed her from behind the wheel. His bike was in the back of the truck so they both could ride together to Placid County.

“You’d be bored stiff in the city, Jebb. I KNOW that. I can practice Law anywhere in the state. I can always go back into private practice. I’m sure that Tom and Michelle would even throw me a couple of clients if I needed them. There ain’t no reason to stay where you’ll have nothing to do. I’m willing to go anywhere you want to go.”

“ANYWHERE?” Jebb asked. He really was ready to stay in Atlanta, but if she was willing to move, he might have to consider the proposition.

Kira nearly stated that as long as it was under a different roof than his mother, then she’d be fine. But considering how much he missed his family, right now she’d even tolerate that. So nodding firmly she repeated, “Anywhere. So, where do you want us to live?”

“Oh, I think I’ll have to think on that one. It ain’t too often that I get such a blank check handed to me.” Jebb grinned at his wife. He liked the sound of that. Wife. Yep, that sounded real good to him.

“You’ll have plenty of time.” Kira grinned back. Soon the two got to the probation office and Jebb was told he’d have to wait since he didn’t have an appointment to see Mr. Hartley. Since it was going to be a while, Kira told Jebb that she had an errand that she wanted to run and would meet him and his father at the diner when she got done.




Even though Kira had never been out to the farm here in Placid, it hadn’t been hard to get directions to it. Now she was waiting for her knock on the door to be answered since she had someone to see and it wasn’t going to be put off any longer. When Pauline opened the door to find her niece/daughter-in-law standing in the door way, she had started to close the door once more only to be stopped by Kira wedging herself into the door.

“I don’t have anything to say to you,” Pauline said as she realized that there was no way that she could get the door closed right now.

“Good, that just gives me more time to talk.” Pauline glared at Kira but she ignored it. “How DARE you treat your son like this. I thought parents were supposed to want their kids happy!”

“How dare I? He was perfectly happy until you came along.”

“Do you even have any idea WHEN that WAS, Pauline? I doubt it. I’ve known your son for a LONG time. We’ve been in love for nearly that long. He’s a great man. Something that I guess I should be thanking you for.”

“He is a great man, and he deserves to have someone who isn’t-”

“Me? Someone who isn’t a woman who ended up being a relative without even knowing it due to a freak twist of fate? Maybe he does deserve someone better. Lord knows I still don’t know why he loves me. BUT HE DOES! Something, for which I’m grateful for and thank God every night for.”

Pauline gave Kira a hard look at Kira speaking of her son. He doesn’t love her. He can’t. Which means there could only be ONE reason that her son had to of settled for this tramp. “I’m guessing now that you’ve reeled Jebb in, it means that I can expect him to be telling everyone that he’s goin’ to be a daddy soon. Not that I’d believe that-”

“You think that I’m PREGNANT? Is that why you think that Jebb married me? You think that I TRAPPED him?”

“You wouldn’t be the first woman to get a ring the old fashioned way,” Pauline sneered as she became more convince that her son had been tricked down the aisle.

“I suppose that denying it wouldn’t do much good. I’ll tell you what, in a few months, when it is obvious that I’m NOT pregnant, then you’ll have your answer.” Kira took a deep breath as she tried to reign herself in. This conversation was quickly getting out of hand. “Pauline, I didn’t come here to fight with you. I came here to try to convince you to talk to Jebb. He misses all of you.”

“He should have thought about that before he went runnin’ off with-”

“With me. Yeh, I get it. But marrying me doesn’t change the fact that he loves you.” Kira saw slight movement in the hall that let her know that they now had an audience. “His sisters too. He misses all of you. Don’t shut him out.”

“You are no one to be telling me how to run my family, Kira.”

“No, I’m not. When it comes to families, I know absolutely nothing except one thing. Anyone who would throw their family away is an idiot. For Jebb’s sake, call him. Talk to him. I’ll even stay away when you do if you don’t want me there. But you’d might as well get used to having me around Pauline because I’m here for good. I’m your son’s wife, not just a girlfriend anymore, which means I’m not going no where.” Pauline had tuned her out. She’d studied enough jurors to know the signs. “And as far as the girls go,” Kira heard shushing in the hall to let her know that at least THEY were listening. “All they have to do is call collect anytime they want to talk to their brother and you wouldn’t even have to know about it.”

“Are you encouraging my other kids to defy me TOO?”

“Not at all. Just stating a fact for anyone willing to hear it. I guess I’ll be going now. It looks like I’ve said everything that will get heard for today anyway.” With that, Kira walked out of the door and got back into her truck and headed to town to meet Jebb at the diner.




“Jebb! I wasn’t expecting you today. How are you?”

“Hi, Roy. I’m doin’ real good. And I wasn’t really expectin’ to come here but I need to talk to you about something.” Jebb shook the older man’s hand and then sat in the chair across for the sparse desk that was in the small cramped office.

“What about?”

“Well, I need to change two things on my paperwork. One, I need to change my address, and two, I need to change my marital status.” Jebb smiled as he saw the man take in what he was saying.

“I just saw your mother a couple days ago; she didn’t say anything about you gettin’ married!”

“Yeh, well, she ain’t exactly happy about it.”

“When did this happen?”

“The day after Christmas. I’m goin’ to be livin’ in Atlanta, at least for the next month or so.”

“Atlanta? Why Atlanta?”

“Kira works as a Public Defender there.”

“Wait a minute, I’ve had some cases up there before I came here. You ain’t married to Kira Kyle?”

“It’s Duke now.” Jebb smiled in response.

“Well, congratulations. But you said for a month or so. What are you plannin’ after that?”

“Well, we haven’t worked that out completely yet. But we may go to Hazzard. We both have family there.”

“Hazzard? That’s Boss Hogg’s County ain’t it.”

“Yes sir.”

Roy Hartley flipped through the file that he’d gotten out when he’d heard that Jebb was here. “You realize that you’ve got less than four months left on your probation.”

“Yes sir, I do.”

“And if you go to Hazzard, you’ll fall under Hogg’s jurisdiction? Which means you may NOT get off probation on time with the way he goes after anyone with the name Duke.”

“Yes sir.”

“I’ll tell you what. You ain’t never really given me any trouble since you’ve been assigned to me. What with the fact that you’ve got such a short amount of time left and it would cost so much to transfer your case to not just one but two counties in that amount of time, I’ll recommend that what’s left of your sentence to be vacated.”

“I’d certainly appreciate that.”

“Well, like I said. You ain’t never given me any trouble and I think that new wife of yours will keep ya in line. Consider it a wedding present. After all, I’m sure that it wasn’t you that thought of coming here today.”

Jebb’s smile got broader, “Guilty.”

“Well, I’ll get this paperwork started for ya.”

“Thank ya Roy.” Jebb got up and shook his hand to leave. He then left and walked down the street towards the diner to have lunch with Kira and his Pop. He was nearly there when Mary Ellen stopped him on the sidewalk.

“Hey Jebb. It’s been a long time. I haven’t seen you in weeks. Not since you ran out on me that is. You’ll have to make that up to me sometime.”

“Mary Ellen, I told ya before, I ain’t interested. In fact I have a-”

“Now you ain’t gonna start spewing out that stuff about having a girlfriend again are you?”

“I wasn’t goin’ to say girlfriend. I was goin’ to say WIFE.”

Mary Ellen smirked at the Duke Boy in front of her. Like she was going to believe that! “If you’re married, then I’ll move up north and live with the Yankees. Where’s your supposed wife at?”

“Right here.” Kira came up behind Jebb and slipped her right arm around Jebb’s waist. “I’m Kira and you are?” Kira extended her left hand to offer it for a hand shake. A bit catty she knew but she was still running on steam from her talk with Pauline. Mary Ellen just looked at the hand as if Kira was a leper and touching her would only spread the disease to herself. She did, however, see the twin bands of gold on Kira’s hand.

“Kira, this here is Mary Ellen. She’s the preacher’s daughter.”

Kira eyed the woman in front of her. Clearly, the pastor needed to do a bit more preaching at home. She’d defended two bit hookers straight off the streets that were wearing more clothes than her. “A pleasure, I’m sure. Now, I’m sure that you’ll excuse us. My husband and I have a lunch date.”

Mary Ellen gave a cross look at both Dukes in front of her before storming off towards her small red sedan.

“And here I didn’t think YOU were the kind to get jealous easily.” Jebb laughed as he watched the woman that his mother had wanted him to date drive off.

“She caught me on an off day,” Kira shrugged as she answered.

“I think I like this side of you.” Jebb leaned down and gave Kira a slow kiss only stopping at the sound of someone clearing their throat.

“Should I take a rain check on lunch so you two can get a room?” John found it amusing to watch the two pull apart and Kira and Jebb’s faces were beat red from embarrassment. Though Jebb did find it funny too, since it was hard to get Kira embarrassed but with her pale complexion, was always easy to see when it happened.

“Nah, Pop. It’ll wait. It’s good to see you.” Jebb took one hand in his in a shake while reaching with the other to pull his dad into a hug. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too, son. You got married sooner than I expected, but I’d say it agrees with you.”

“It does. How about we all go inside and talk over lunch?”

“Sounds good to me.” The three Dukes all went into the small diner and drew a fair amount of stares with so many in the small town curious about the stranger with long red hair sitting with the attractive blond Duke.

As Kira and Jebb ate lunch with John, they all discussed the small wedding that John had missed. John recognized the wedding band that was on Kira’s hand that complimented the small engagement ring that his son had given his new daughter-in-law. Already, he’d seen that Kira made sure that Jebb took care of what was needed with his probation. Of course, he’d expect her to worry about the legalities. Considering that worrying about such things was her job.

John watched the two younger people in front of him and wished that his wife could see what he saw. His son was happy and both of them really did love one another. All too soon, lunch was over and John promised to call his son in a few days (since Jebb may not get through with Pauline monitoring the calls for right now) and the three went their own way. John back to the farm; Jebb and Kira to Atlanta.



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