Hazzardous Perspectives, pt 9: To Serve and Protect

by: BlackJack Murphy

(Rosco’s POV)

Rob was still poking that damn rifle in my back. It hurt. It really hurt. We kept walking and I still didn’t see anybody. Maybe they didn’t see us. Maybe they wouldn’t until it was too late…maybe….

Maybe it was finally all over.

I suddenly felt very tired. It was all over. Who was I kidding? Rob would get his way, I’d drive him away from here and then he’d leave me in a ditch somewhere. I hoped somebody would find me…

I blinked away the thought. Stop it. Use yer brain. This is NOT over yet…

I looked at the patrol car as we came closer to it.

“Guess them hicks are smart,” Rob said. “Either that, you ain’t worth much…”

I snorted in reply. If it weren’t for the hand over my mouth I’d have—

I abandoned my thoughts of a witty retort and realized I still had a chance. Albeit a risky one. A chance that if I didn’t do it right, I’d pay for it dearly. After all the rifle was aimed point blank at my back.

(Boss’ POV)

Not being able to stand watching Rosco being marched off to certain doom, I crept out behind the last tree and stepped into the clearing, following quietly a few feet behind Rob, crouching down so that hopefully he wouldn’t see me in his peripheral vision if he glanced back far enough. I thought maybe to sneak up behind him, startle him enough to have him let go of Rosco and then I’d hit him with everything I had. Or push him against the patrol car and conk his head on the fender. Yeah! Heh heh! That’d work…

Less than five feet from the patrol car, however, they stopped walking. Something was wrong…

(Rosco’s POV)

I stopped walking and feigned dizziness. I let my body weight shift on it’s own and I leaned back against the rifle and Rob.

“What the hell?” Rob said. He pushed to keep me standing and rammed the rifle point into me. “Keep walking!”

I shook my head and gave an ill sounding moan. I leaned back again, nearly going dead weight on him. The rifle moved back and then slipped out of my back and he caught me with his hand. The rifle barrel slipped under my right arm. I had my chance!

I quickly grabbed a hold of the rifle with my right hand and then opened my mouth enough to bite Rob’s hand. He screamed and I wrenched the rifle out of his grip when he let go to try to free his other hand from my teeth.

He swore like truck driver fighting with a sailor. His other hand clawed at my face. Once the rifle was securely in my hands I let go and swung around to hit him with the gun.

But somebody else beat me to it.


(Boss’ POV)

I hit him like a linebacker sacking a quarterback on SuperBowl Sunday. I pushed him into the back fender of Rosco’s patrol car and held him there.

Rob tried to push back, but needless to say I was a might bit heavier than him. I grabbed at his arms and pulled them behind his back. “Heh heh! Nice to see ya again, Rob. Remember me??”

“Boss!!” Rosco exclaimed. I glanced over to see my brother-in-law looking surprised, happy and relieved at the same time. I was a bit surprised myself, that Rosco managed to think of a way to try to dupe Rob. He pulled his handcuffs from his gun belt and proceeded to put them on Rob’s wrists.

By this time the Dukes were catching up to the party. Bo bent over, out of breath from running. Luke offered to help Rosco put Rob in the patrol car. Not surprisingly, Rob’s head hit the top of the door frame on the way in. “Oops, sorry ‘bout that,” Rosco grinned.

I smiled at my brother-in-law, then looked up towards the heavens, mouthing a silent “Thank you.”

(Rosco’s POV)

I closed the patrol car door, relieved my posterior was finally out of trouble. I grinned widely. “Khee!” Fickle Coltrane luck strikes again.

I turned to see Boss. He seemed to be studying me. His face looked solemn and serious.

(Boss’ POV)

My brother-in-law turned to look at me. The smile on his face slowly faded, replaced with concern and confusion.

“Boss, what’s wrong?” he asked.

How could I answer that? I’m not quite sure myself. Just a few days ago, he’d fought for our lives in my office and I thought he’d paid the ultimate price. Then I found him alive and well in Carson’s hideout. When we were in the woods, making our escape, he again fought off our attackers with a bravery I didn’t know he had. And then, holding his limp body on the cold ground after Carson had discharged his gun, I thought I’d lost him again. And now, after all he’s been through, he looks worried about ME.

I sniffled back a tear as he approached me. “Boss? What’s wrong, little fat buddy? You got somethin’ in yer eye?” he asked.

“No Rosco… no,” I replied. “It’s just that…I mean…” I stammered.

“What, Boss?”

“I’m… I’m just so glad you’re ok,” I said, pulling him into a hug. Rosco stood stiffly for a second, seemingly taken aback by the show of affection. Then he returned the hug, a small “Khee” escaping his lips.

“Boss, I…” he attempted to speak, but I cut him short. “Rosco, wait. I have somethin’ else to say.” I took a few seconds to gather my thoughts and sift through my emotions.

“Rosco… you an’ I have been through hell the past few days. You, in particular. An’ it’s been all my fault.”

“But, Boss…” Rosco started to protest.

“No, Rosco, it has. We wouldn’t have been in this mess if it weren’t for me. But despite that… through it all… you were the most devoted, faithful friend I could ask for. You defended me, you protected me, and a few times I thought… I thought you’d… given your life for me. I thought I’d lost the only friend I had.”

I wiped a tear away that threatened to roll down my cheek. “Dangit, Rosco. Ya know, words like these don’t come easy for me. But after what we’ve been through, you deserve to know just how I feel about ya.”

Rosco seemed a bit embarrassed by my little speech. He was as unaccustomed to hearing those words as I was to saying them. He fidgeted a little and stammered out “Uh…well…gee, Boss…you know…ah….”. But then an enormous grin spread across his face. His back straightened and he held his head high. “You know how I feel about ya, Boss. An’ ya know, nobody messes with my li’l fat buddy. Not while Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane’s around. Khee!”

He pinched my cheek and drew me into a hug. I threw my arms around him, glad he this ordeal was ending the way it was and not how I’d envisioned it was going to end so many times over the last few days.

A round of applause broke out and Rosco and I looked around. We suddenly realized we’d had an audience. Jesse and the Duke boys were giving us broad grins, clapping their hands as if it were the curtain call at an opera. I was a bit embarrassed at first, but then I didn’t care. Damnit, I didn’t care a bit. I smiled, then offered a handshake to Jesse and the boys.

“I wanna thank you all for everything you did. If it weren’t for y’all, I don’t know that me n’ Rosco’d still be here.” Rosco nodded in solemn agreement.

Jesse looked at his nephews and then at us, the occasional thorns in his side. “J.D., us Dukes look out for one another and we look out for our friends. Now, we ain’t always agreed with you n’ Rosco, but we ain’t about to see no harm come to ya. If there’s one thing you can always count on, it’s us Dukes.”

Not one for extended sentimental mush, I announced, “Well then, I think everythin’ that needed sayin’ has been said. Rosco, we’d best get these criminals behind bars.” I pulled out a cigar, popped it in my mouth, and searched for my lighter. Rosco pulled a match from his belt and offered me a light.

I took a few puffs as he held the match under my cigar. “Uh, Boss?” he asked.


“Considerin’ all the hazardous duty I’ve had lately.. ya think ya might possibly find it in yer heart to gimme a raise?”

“Rosco…” I said sternly.

“Just a teeny one?”

I stared harshly, trying to keep from grinning. As I started to walk towards the car, he pleaded some more, “C’mon, Boss. How ‘bout an extra five percent?”

I could barely keep from chuckling.I stopped in my tracks. “I can’t give ya an extra five percent, Rosco. But how ‘bout instead of fifty percent of fifty percent, I give ya an extra fifty percent of fifty percent of fifty percent?”

“Ooh! I like that. Boss, yer so good to me. Khee!”

I silently chuckled. Of course, I wouldn’t do that to him after we’d just been through. Well, maybe later, if money gets tight.

As we got in the patrol car, Rosco kept droning on and on about what he’d do with his extra money. I sat in the passenger’s seat, absorbing Rosco’s reverie and grinning like a Cheshire cat. Yep, things were back to normal already.


The End

2 thoughts on “Hazzardous Perspectives, pt 9: To Serve and Protect

  1. Truly awesome story! Rosco is my favourite and I loved the way you wrote for him, as well as all the other characters, in this story. Thanks very much!

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