by: Bobbie Raye Duke

**Author’s note: Those of you who may be familiar with the famous lumberjack routine on the TV show Monty Python’s Flying Circus will know about this. It’s a Dukes of Hazzard version of it.**

*Bo/Daisy walk out in front of viewers, with woods/wilderness behind them, banjos pick out happy melody, Bo is peppy, Daisy stands beside him, smiling proudly*

Bo:

I’m a redneck,
and that’s okay,
I sleep all night and I work all day

Rednecks *sitting around/on top General Lee nearby*:

He’s a redneck,
and that’s okay,
He sleeps all night and he works all day

Bo:

I drive my car,
I eat my lunch,
I go to the lavatory,
On Wednesdays I go shoppin’
And have buttered scones for tea.

Rednecks:

He drives his car,
he eats his lunch,
he goes to the lavatory,
On Wednesdays he goes shoppin’
and has buttered scones for tea.

He’s a redneck,
and that’s okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

Bo:

I drive my car,
I skip and jump,
I like to press wild flowers
I like to put on Daisy Dukes
And hang around in bars

Rednecks:

He drives his car,
he skips and jumps,
he likes to press wild flowers.
He likes to put on Daisy Dukes
And… *rednecks suddenly shocked and baffled* …hang around in bars?!

He’s a redneck, and that’s okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

Bo:

I drive my car
I wear high heels
suspendies and a bra
I wish I’d been a girlie
Just like my dear mama
*Daisy pauses, suddenly starts crying*

Rednecks:

He drives his car
He wears high—*rednecks protesting indistinctly, shocked, all depart from General Lee, appalled*

Bo:

–suspendies and a bra
I wish I’d been a girlie
Just like my dear mama!

*music stops*

Daisy, crying:

And ah thought you was rugged! *slaps Bo in stomach, runs away crying*

Bo *awkwardly, birds tweeting in background w/sound of creek running* : :))