T’was The Night Before Christmas, Hazzard Style

Adaptation by BL Davenport

Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Except B.L.’s mouse.
The stockings were hung
By the chimney with care
In hopes that General Lee
Soon would be there.
Lori nestled all snug in her bed
While visions of Luke danced in her head.
Daisy in her kerchief and Cooter in his cap
Had just settled down for a night cap.
When out in the yard
There was such a clatter,
Cooter sprang from the bed
To see what was the matter.
Away to the window he flew unlike flash
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
Gave the luster of midday to objects below.
When what to his wandering eyes should appear
But the General Lee coming near,
Bo at the wheel
And Luke shifting gears.
Uncle Jesse there in the back shouting and yelling
“Bo slow down before ya get us all killed”!
Dry leaves did fly
As they met with a road block, they mount to the sky
With a loud thump they landed on the roof.
As Cooter drew in his head and was turning around
Down the chimney Boss Hogg came with a bound.
He was dressed in his white
All covered in dirt oh what a sight!
With the help of Rosco and Enos he filled the kids stockings high with delight.
When he was done Enos giggled, while Rosco shushed “hush dipstick”.
They all turned with a jerk, and laying their fingers aside of their nose up the chimney they rose.
They climbed back in the General and I heard as they drove out of sight
The sounds of Dixie blare through the night.

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