by: Marty Chrisman

Jesse knocked on the door to the room that Luke and Bo shared. When Luke didn’t answer, Jesse opened the door and went into the room. Luke was lying on the bed with one arm thrown up over his eyes. Dark shadows filled the room. Luke had pulled the curtains, shutting out the light. Jesse was deeply concerned about his oldest nephew. Luke had not come out of his room, except for the funeral, in almost two weeks. Bo and Jesse took him his meals but he seldom ate more than a few bites at a time. He had fallen into a deep dark depression, a depression that Jesse knew could be dangerous in Luke’s present state of mind.

“Luke, we need to talk.” Jesse said, sitting down on the edge of Bo’s bed. Luke didn’t answer but Jesse knew that he was awake and could hear him. He continued “I know how you’re feeling and I know what you’re thinking. I know how easy it would be to just take my ole shotgun out to the barn some night and make the hurt go away.” Jesse’s voice broke slightly as he struggled to control his emotions “But, damn it, boy…I couldn’t stand to lose you too! And I’ll do whatever it takes to make damn sure that don’t happen!”  Jesse’s use of profanity was an indication of just how upset he was. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, trying to calm himself so that he could get through to Luke. “We all loved Kelly too and we’re all hurting. But we should be hurting as a family and helping each other git through this. Keeping it bottled up inside of you ain’t gonna make it no better, it’ll just make it worse.” He took another deep breath before telling Luke the plan he had come with. He just hoped it wasn’t too late to save Luke from himself. “I called Pauline. She said you can come up there and stay for awhile….get away from Hazzard so you won’t run into memories of Kelly wherever you go. I ain’t gonna make you go if you don’t want too…….I just want you to think about it.” Having said his peace, Jesse stood up and left the room.

Even though he hadn’t responded, Luke had heard every word Jesse said. He should have known that Jesse knew what he’d been thinking. He wanted to be with Kelly even if he had to die to do it. It just seemed to take too much effort to go on living without her. Unknown to Jesse, Luke had found the prescription that Doc Applebee had given him for sedatives after Kelly died. Luke had the prescription, all he had to do was get the guts to have it filled, then swallow the pills and go sleep forever. The church taught that killing yourself was wrong but Luke didn’t care. He was angry at God for taking Kelly away from him, for letting her die the way she did. He was angry at the doctors too for forcing him to have to be the one to give them permission to pull the plug. He felt as if he had killed Kelly himself.

Rationally, there was a part of his mind that knew that wasn’t true. The stroke had just been too much on top of her other injuries. Her body was just to weak to fight back. Luke knew he had no choice but to let her die in peace. But, when she died, she took his heart and his will to live with her. He just wished she had taken the rest of him too. All she had left behind was the empty shell of man. Luke reached under the bed for the jug of shine he had hidden there. Tonight, like every other night since the funeral, he would drink until he couldn’t drink anymore, until the liquor numbed his body and his mind enough for him to pass out.

When Bo went to bed later that evening, Luke was lying face down across the bed with one arm hanging off the side of the mattress. Bo knew about the jug hidden under Luke’s bed. He knew that Luke was passed out, that once more he had drank himself into a stupor just so he forget for awhile, just a little while. Bo was as concerned about Luke as the rest of the family was. Maybe even more. The two cousins were closer than brothers. Luke had always been there for Bo, there to protect him or to comfort him when he was hurt. Luke was always the strong one, until now. When Kelly had disappeared, Luke had gone into the marines to try and forget and get over her. Bo knew that this time it wouldn’t be that easy, this time Luke was dangerously close to taking the permanent way out. He knew that Jesse had talked to Luke earlier that day about going to Aunt Pauline’s place for awhile. Even though he would hate to see him leave Hazzard again for any length of time, Bo hoped Luke would decide to do that instead of doing something that couldn’t be undone.

Luke was still sleeping the next morning when Bo got out of bed. He showered and dressed and went downstairs for breakfast. Jesse was giving Bo a list of jobs to get done before the day was over when they both saw Luke in the doorway. He looked terrible. He hadn’t changed clothes or shaved in a couple of days and his eyes were flat and dead, sunken deep into their sockets with dark black circles underneath them. Daisy gasped, trying to hide her shock at Luke’s appearance.

“Luke,” Jessie said gently “Why don’t you come sit down and let Daisy get you something to eat?”

Slowly, Luke shook his head from side to side. Looking at his uncle, he said in a barely audible voice “I’ll go to Pauline’s if that’s what you want.” There was a strange tone to his voice that Jesse wasn’t sure he liked but he decided not to say anything.

“Good, I’ll give her a call today.”

As Luke turned and disappeared back into the living room, Bo looked at his uncle and said in a worried voice “You think he’s gonna be okay, Uncle Jesse?”

“I hope so, Bo. If anybody can get through to him, maybe Pauline can. You get hold of Cooter. If he’s going to Pauline’s he’s going to need a car to use while he’s there. And ask Cooter if he can go along, one of you can drive Luke up there and the other one can follow in the General.” Bo nodded. Pauline and her husband, Jed, had moved to Greenville, Ohio last year when Jed was offered a job that was too good to turn down, even if it did mean leaving Hazzard. It was almost a 12 hour drive, a drive that Luke was in no condition to make.

Jesse called Pauline and told her that Luke was coming. She was Jessie’s baby sister and the boys had always been her favorite nephews. Jesse knew that Luke would be in good hands at Pauline’s place. He told Bo to tell Cooter that they should leave early the next morning before Luke had a chance to change his mind. Jesse just hoped that Luke wouldn’t have to be gone from home too long.  But he also knew this was the best thing he could do for Luke right now, even if Luke didn’t necessarily see it that way.

Cooter readily agreed to accompany Bo on the trip to Ohio and told him he had a car that Luke could use as long as he needed to. He would be at the farm bright and early the next morning and ready to go.

Bo decided to turn in early so he would be rested for the long drive the next day. He was mildly surprised to find Luke still awake when he went to their shared room. Luke was standing by the window, staring out into the darkness.

“Hey, cuz” Bo said, sitting down on the edge of his bed and pulling off his boots. He glanced at Luke who continued to stare out of the window, ignoring him. Oh well, Bo thought to himself. Even if Luke still wasn’t talking to him (Or anybody else for that matter), Bo decided to try anyway. “Why’d you agree to go to Pauline’s? I know you don’t really want to.” He was surprised when Luke decided to answer.

“Because Jesse wants me to.” Luke in a strangely quiet voice that sent chills up Bo’s spine. He didn’t sound like Luke at all.

“What do you want, Luke?”

“For it to be over…..”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Bo asked with a puzzled frown.

Luke chose not to answer him. Instead he turned his back on Bo and started undressing, then climbed under the covers on his bed with his back still turned towards his younger cousin. Still puzzling over Luke’s cryptic answer, Bo finished undressing himself and went to bed.